If your kids came home on spring
break and happened to leave some medicinal marijuana since it is legal to
purchase in so many states in America now, smoking the stuff can make you think
of America’s state of affairs in a whole new perspective. This should be April
Fool’s Day and not May 1st. Our
new President Donald Trump has shaken things up a lot in the past 100 days. We
should thank him for energizing most Americans to get out of their ever so long
couches and easy chairs to protest about just about anything you can think of. I
decided in the medicinal haze that Trump must be a Russian.
He is well paid along with
Manifold, Flynn and probably Nunez too by the Russians to get hold of our
nuclear arsenal. Ever since the Cold War of the Kennedy era our missiles have
all been pointed towards Russia for our protection. Trump could change that
now. He has our war ships sailing in the wrong
direction and now he is looking the other way at North Korea and not to Russia
anymore. He says that Russia is our friend. The Russians know how to hack into
everything. I hope they haven’t hacked our nuclear weapons codes too. Trump and
his good white supremacy friend Bannon don’t even like America’s traditional
news organizations. Will Trump the businessman sell control of our weapons to
Russia too?
Why is he picking on all the
brown people in this country? The Mexicans do just about everything for us from
housekeeping to gardening. They even pick our fruit and vegetables from the
farms. The people with Turbans drive all our cabs and own all the gas stations
in America. Does he want all the white people to have to do all this stuff
themselves? A lot of people said they would move to Canada if Trump got
elected. Well, no one is moving there either. What has Canadians ever done for
Americans?
If Trump really had our backs he
would be looking at those Canadians more carefully and leave the Mexicans and
Muslims alone. Some more medicinal marijuana will explain why. Those Canadians
are all Socialists that have free health care for all. They are all white
people there and have the only snow left to ski on. Canadians walk freely
across our borders totally undetected. They got rid of the Miss Canada Beauty Pageant Donald! Americans are consumed with our rising
interest rates and dwindling bank accounts. Canada could easilly have a military buildup along our border with
them. Russians like snow too.
The Canadians are earning good
money in America. Guys like William Shatner, Michael J. Fox, Mike Meyers, Alex
Trebek, Ivan Reitman, Tommy Chong, Rick James, Rich
Little, Paul Anka, Joni Mitchell, Rick Moranis, K.D. Lang to name a few. There isn’t any real Canadian culture. Who
goes out to get Canadian food? Americans eat Mexican food and are into Humus
now. Why do Canadians own all the Zamboni technology in all the ice skating
rinks? They have winter 11 months a year. They even own the prettiest side of
Niagara Falls on the border with New York. We need all our gun owning red necks
to patrol the Canadian border that stretches all across America from the Atlantic
Ocean to the Pacific Ocean. The guys who shot up our movie theater and killed
the school children were both white people. Canada has free mental health care
for all there not us. Just sayin!
Now I know why Americans need
more legal pot! The stuff makes you think differently. We should deport those
who drink Canada Dry. We are all frightened that we will be nuked in only the
past 100 days. We need to protect our New York Hydro Power Facility on that
Canadian Border. We shouldn’t be fooled by our love of Canadian bacon and Maple
Syrup that we love. Our border with Canada is the longest unprotected border in
the world with 90% of Canadians living close to that border. Can we protect
ourselves against that?
The Canadians have too clean a reputation
in this country. Their land is too clean too. No trash thrown around there and
little pollution. They even speak slang free English there. Can we trust them?
Those Canadian Mounties on their horses can travel through any terrain. They
don’t need any good roads. Trump has
made us paranoid of everyone everywhere including Obama and Hillary. For
whatever reason, we are definitely paranoid and became so in less than 100 days. Donald
should give all those white people that voted for him who are unemployed and
send them to Canada with their black lungs from coal mining and steel dust
filled bodies from our closed steel mills. Give them jobs there with their
second amendment guns to protect our northern border. America has a surplus of
American made assault weapons. They could sneak into Canada for some free
health care there too.
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