Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Tonight we say to whoever we make eye contact with, Happy New Year but this year is harder than most to feel happy about most things. Planes are dropping out of the sky killing hundreds at a time. Children are still hungry in Somalia and Africa, families are being torn apart because of deportation rules and now cops are randomly being shot in the face. As a retired cop, attorney and judge, my life was involved in rules and law enforcement so you can understand why I get so angry in my rants here when it is obvious that no one has ethics including the priests and cares to follow the laws that make us the civilized and prosperous country we are.

My 20 year old daughter will not watch the news with me anymore. She says it is too depressing meanwhile I love when we discuss new issues in the news. I understand her frustration now. I can not take much more of the reduction of civilized behavior everywhere and they have to stop with those Cialis erectile dysfunction commercials during dinner time. My dick works just fine stop looking at me. Ugh now you all know. At this point, or time, I think I want to drink and New Year’s Eve is the drinking holiday. Meanwhile they are making more cops than ever work this holiday and enforce the drinking laws. So, how do you drink and not be intoxicated enough to be able to drive somewhere?

All the money in the world can’t pay yourself out of a hangover or can it? Tonight will be the parties, the champagne and the IV drip. THE WHAT??????? Yes there is now a quick fix to getting sober fast. There are actually medical services like IV Doc. that promise a new instant hangover cure. After a couple of holiday parties and you are tanked with your favorite spirit, clients can go online to the website and contact someone to arrange for an in-home, 30-minute, I.V. hydration therapy. You can quickly recover from dehydration caused by jet lag, exercise fatigue, general exhaustion and drunkenness. You can make appointments on line, talk with a physician and within 2 hours a nurse will bring an I. V. bag to your doorstep.

I.V. Doc. says that their carefully crafted cocktail of vitamins, medication and saline solution will put the pep back in your step more effectively than h2o alone. When you take a sip of water, only 40 to 50% per cent of that water is actually absorbed into your system. So, when they inject you with the I.V., it will go directly into your system. Yes, pump it directly into your veins. Ok it does sound evasive but all you tattooed and pierced bums should not be afraid of an I.V. especially if it will get you sober and ready to go soon. It will cost you from $165 to up to $300   for a 20 to 45 minute session and that doesn’t include a tip. Some people say the price doesn’t matter if it works and gets the job done. It can be done at any location and not at a hospital or doctor’s office.
It seems like a quick fix. Some Doctors think it is a rip off. Dr. Robert Glatter, an Emergency Physician at Lenox Hill Hospital says,” The cost for a box of saline or salt water costs about $4 to 5 dollars and typically it is marked up to a few hundred dollars. Then what they are adding to the solution has not been proven to benefit anyone. “ But those who swear by the morning after I.V. say it is going to be a very happy and hydrated New Year.  To all my friends here enjoy your evening, your reading of my rants make me feel significant in a crazy world. My first drink is a toast to you. Happy New Year folks see you next year and hopefully we all will not need an  I.V. to get functional again.

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