It is officially spring. The bees are pollinating and maybe you too. How much do you know about sex? Ian Kerner, CNN’s Health Sex authority has a new quiz. He claims to have an ordinary sex life personally but these days, what is the definition of ordinary? What about the missionary position? Did the name of that have anything to do with those holy guys that wear the brown robes? Who has fetishes? Men more than women.

Take the quiz!

People with endytophilla:

A) Like to have sex in elevators?

B) Like to do it with their cloths on?

C) Never have sex because they’re afraid of germs?

D) Like to roll around in dirt?

The answer: B

Which mammal has a retractable penis and can use it like a groping hand?

A) a dolphin

B) a hippopotamus

C) Charlie sheen

The answer: A

What percentage of women prefer sleep to sex?

A) 98%

B) 62%

C) 41%

D) 2%

The answer: C

Ok! I agree this is stupid but this guy is an authority on CNN. His information should be scientific and journalistic. Besides, who cares about the answers to these type of questions. The only thing you need to know is if you are having sex, if you are having sex with another human and not with a device or “toy”. If you are having sex often enough, and if you are enjoying sex in Spring where everything is new and looks pretty and smells good. Yes, the new leaves on the trees, the pretty flowers that also smell good, all should also apply to your partner.

Society pays too much attention on sex. Yes, it feels good and is a release and is a major function of a healthy body but must we see it on every reality show? Should it always be an excuse after you are totally bombed from drugs or alcoholic drinks? No, It should be a celebration like the changing of the four seasons if you live in a place to enjoy the four seasons. We need to have a season of love and maybe so many people wouldn’t be at war.

Not the religious sex either. This Muslim crap of gifts of virgins and after destroying something you get the gift of multiple virgins in heaven. That crap is twisted. Or, the Hasidic crap of marrying someone you don’t know and have to have sex with them through a bed sheet and hope she is a virgin and look at blood on the sheet after a totally impersonal act. Ugh! Or the crap that a Catholic marriage can be annulled even after having children for a hefty donation to the bloated bejeweled priests.

Sex is a wonderful thing and so is spring. Thank you whatever God you believe in.