The Children's Wish List

We are in the middle of the holiday season where we all ask the children, What do they want for gifts? Well, be ready for their requests especially if you let them follow the news or let them hear anything that Trump has spoken. They might want a new kitten and ask,  What  did Trump mean when he said  grab them by the pussy?

 You could ask them if they have been naughty or nice but they might ask, Is President Trump on the naughty list with 19 accusers of sexual harassment?  Shouldn’t he be on a registry instead on a list?

Should you be honest and be a good child? They might say that they learned that if you admit that you have done something wrong like Al Franken did, you get in trouble and lose your job  but if you don’t admit you did wrong things like collusion with the Russians during the election, you get to become President.  

If you are bad you might get coal in your stocking child and they might say, I don’t think so, we all know that coal is a dying industry.

The little boy might ask for a football for Christmas but ask, Why do the players kneel down during the National Anthum? Do they hate the troops? So you can avoid that complicated issue by just saying that the football players are tired. Then the kid will ask, Why? Are they tired from all their brain injuries?

The little girl might ask for a Barbie but want to know if the transgender folks will take it away from her  and say the boys should have it too.

If the kids want to talk about the opioids their older brother has in his sock drawer just tell them Santa doesn’t have any for Christmas.

Keep it simple and just ask the kid if she just wants a toy. She might ask,  Just like the toy Matt Lauer gave to his co-worker? That six inch vibrating thing?

Look do you want the new Play Station?  The kid might say, Sure, that will grant  more  factory jobs for Chinese kids.

The child might say that she or he doesn’t want anything for Christmas but just for things to be safe and ok. Then you will have to remind them that Trump and North Korea wants to nuke each other, that there are riots in Jerusalem instead of the baby Jesus and that climate change will probably lead to a forest fire, a tornado or a   hurricane that will destroy your home.

Well then the child will just want to donate money to a charity but will want to do it in Bitcoins since the value of that is worth more than money.

I would say that my New Year’s Resolutions is to not let the kids watch the news or listen to anything Trump says. Things are a bit crazy now and we seem to have lost all prospective on what is naughty or nice but you know because your Mom let you watch FOX News. But as bad as things might seem, I believe that things will be ok. Maybe not today or even tomorrow but someday soon in the next three years when there will be a new Presidential election.  Most people in America are good people and not racists or mean to any living thing and those good people eventually will fix our country if they will be able to work in our government toy shop where Democrats and Republicans can be equally represented and will want to work together despite party lines. Have a Happy Holiday All My Reading Friends!